Monday, September 29, 2014

Chapter Three Part 1: The Mill, The Kobold and The Archer

Back in Greenest Keep the clerics tended to the rescued civilians, using healing spells on the seriously wounded and patching up those who had scrapes and bruises from the retreat. Back in the war room the heroes met with the general, who was expressing his gratitude for the rescue.

"Thank you again," the general said, "the cultists are starting to pull back but there are still some attacking the mill. If it is destroyed the town won't make it through the winter."

"Whats in it for us?" Calvin said, fondling the head of a Kobold that he had killed.

"If gold is what you want," the general said, a look of disgust on his face, "that you shall have."

"Where is this mill?" Kolixen asked, counting her arrows.

The general guided the heroes to the top of the keep where an archer stood watch. Sensing the group's approach the archer turned around, palming his sword. When he saw the general the archer snapped to attention.

"At ease soldier," the general said. "If you look off to the south west from here you can just see the mill."

"I see," Kolixen said, eyes narrowed as she pulled out an arrow. "It looks like there are some Kobolds attempting to start a fire, I bet I could hit one of them from here."

The archer raised an eyebrow speculatively. Kolixen drew her bow and volleyed an arrow towards the mill.

"Damn, I missed," Kolixen said. "Lets try again.

Meanwhile at the mill George...ya let's call him George... the Kobold soiled himself as an arrow whizzed by his head and embedded itself into the cobblestone wall of the keep. George looked back from where the arrow came from only to see the blur of another arrow aiming straight towards his head. That was the last thing George would ever see.

"That is some fine shooting," the archer said, "Let me introduce myself. I am Jonathon the archer. I bet you I could hit one of the other Kobolds."

"Want to put your money where your mouth is?" Calvin asked. "I bet you four gold you can not hit the Kobold."

"I will take that bet," Jonathon said.

Jonathon took out his bow and steadied a shot. He released the shot and extended his palm to Calvin.

"I believe you owe me four gold," Jonathon said.

"Not so fast," Kolixen said, peering at the mill. "That was a miss."

"But, that's impossible," Jonathon said, frantically looking out towards the mill, "I am the greatest archer there is." Turning back to Calvin he said "Double or nothing?"

"Sure," Calvin said, "more gold for me."

Jonathon steadied another shot and released his bow, peering out towards the mill. Without a word he turned to Calvin and tossed him eight gold before walking to the other side of the roof.

"If you are quite ready," the general said, "could you go stop them now?"

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Chapter two part three: Trouble at the temple

Leave the guys closest to me, get the ranged!

The door blasted open to reveal what appeared to be an entire army outside. Lady Roselina sprayed one of the nearby Kobolds with poison,  Kolixen, Ikol and Hadeus volleyed arrows and I just sat there, mouth agape.

It was as if  a swarm of Cultists, Kobolds and Drakes decided that they were going to get through, no matter the cost. Our strategy was good though and we took care of the creatures further away that could fire at us while Calvin swung his axe back and forth,  crushing our foes like a rock crushes the waves. But like the waves, the foes kept coming.

After fending off an ambush drake that almosy made it over the barricade we decided we were not going to be able to fight our way out. Calvin was slipping in his own blood, Roselina looked madder than usual, the bodies were stacking like cordwood. We yelled at the civilians to run out the back while we kept the enemies occupied. After the majority made it iut we started to kick at the barricade to try and block the door. We managed some but it was time to get out of dodge.

After vollying our last attacks we pulled back. Calvin was very nearly killed as a cultist attacked him while he was retreating.  In the end we were able to run back to the Keep for safety, the memories of that battle strengthening our understanding of the grasp of the situation we were in.

We would need that understanding to deal with what came next.

Sunday, September 14, 2014

Chapter Two Part Two: Trouble at the Temple

The group gathered up, Hadeus, Ikol and Kolixen drew their bows, Lady Rosalina prepared her mind, and I handed over my dagger to Calvin. At once we volleyed our respective attacks before jumping over the wall and into the fray. 

 Well that was a bit of an anticlimax. The initial battle with the Kobolds lasted only about forty seconds. I don't give that barbarian enough credit, he could take a lot of damage while the archers picked them off one by one. After we dispatched the rear guard I went to knock on the door and was nearly decapitated as Calvin swung his great axe at it.

"Way to go you great oaf" I said.....Ok that was a lie, I just pressed my fingers to the bridge of my nose and knocked on the door. A small section of the wall opened up by the door and a half-elf face peaked through.

"Who's there?" The person in the sanctuary asked.

"We don't have time for this," I yelled. "We are here to save you!"

"Who sent you?" The voice said.

"Uggg, crap, I can't remember his name," I stumbled. "That general dude in the keep."

I can't exactly remember how we ended up convincing them to let us in, just plain luck I guess. After they opened the doors I saw the largest display of panic I have ever seen. There were some people praying in a few rows, others were throwing whatever they could find-- bookcases, tables, pews-- in front of the front door. Amid the chaos a lone priest stood tending to some wounded. Calvin was in poor shape. The battling we did throughout the day had him bloody, even if he did not want to admit it.

"You know any healing magic?" I asked the priest. The priest looked towards me, the skin under his eyes drooping. I could tell he hardly had anything left in him.

"I suppose I can do a spell, but I am about wiped." The priest said.

"Our half-ork is in bad shape." I said, walking the priest over to Calvin. "I would appreciate it if you could work on him."

The priest mumbled a short incantation then collapsed on a nearby chair.

"I am sorry, that is the best I can do for now," the priest said, "I will have to rest before I can do any more."

By this time we heard banging at the back door. Hadeus looked out the back door's window.

"Umm guys," Hadius said, "we got company."

The group looked frantically at each other before yelling at the civilians telling them to make a barricade at the back door. In their panic the peasants just became more frightened. Calvin took matters to his own hands and started to throw things to the back of the room. Eventually after we blocked the back door we started to make a path by the front door so as the enemies came in they would be confined and we could pick them off as they came in. Finally Ikol made a small illusion in front of Calvin as a decoy.

We were ready for the battle to come.

Or at least we thought we were

Friday, September 12, 2014

Chapter Two: Part one: Trouble at the Temple

They just kept coming, I never thought we would be able to make it out alive.

"I have another favor to ask of you," he said.

Here we go again, I thought to myself. The raiders were attacking the local temple, and it was apparently our job to stop it.


Ugg, not another temple. I swear, if it were up to me temples would be off-limits. I mean whats the deal, all of those people chanting off key to an unknown deity. At least the temples around the bard's colleges have petitioners who can actually carry a tune. If only they would expand their repertoire beyond the same couple dozen hymns.... I digress

Apparently somewhere during my internal rant the group decided that saving the temple would be a good idea. The only thing I caught was the barbarian grunting something about as long as there is gold involved.

"As long as we are going," I said, "we might as well be smart about it."

The group decided the best path to take would be through the tunnels. The gnome decided to follow us to let us back in after we finished our little jaunt across the siege. While we were heading towards the temple we stuck to the river to mask any path we might make. I looked over and saw several raiders attacking a group of homes so I pointed in the direction of the woods.

After making it to the section of the woods by the temple we started discussing what we should do. There was a small group of Kobolds attempting to start a fire by the door and a large group of cultists and two drakes circling around the perimeter. I came forward with the following excerpt from "The charming rouge"

The Charming Rogue

"Wherest be mine beloved, thou Amondil?" The dashing Lucabrasi asked, gazing out into the starlit night.
"Milord," the butler replied, " the Valdemar family has taken her away and lockest her in a keep."
"I will just have to rescue her from those brutes," the rouge said slipping over the balcony and disappearing into the night.
On the rouge went until he was confronted by a great mass of goblins guarding the keep. Some of these guards stood watch at the door while others walked the perimeter.
"What luck," the dashing rogue said to himself, "the help they have hired will be easy to fool."
What the rogue knew that the Amondil family did not was that the guards hired for the job were not the brightest. Stealthily the rogue went to where the roaming guards would be between himself and the guards at the door. The rogue took out his crossbow and let a bolt fly. 
The bolt found its home in the forehead of one of the goblins. The goblins next to him were shocked and looked in the direction of where the bolt came from. They saw a fellow goblin, holding his crossbow in shock of the sudden action. The door guard saw the weapon and the goblins guarding the door left their post to attack what they thought killed their friend. 
"Thank you my good friends," the rouge said putting his weapon away. "Now if you don't mind me I have a maiden to save."
Following my lead, the cleric cast a minor illusion to create an apparent Kobold standing by the raiders at the door. Meanwhile our ranger took his position and fired at the roaming group as if the illusion was firing.

Unfortunately, we underestimated the intelligence of the raiders. The arrow missed its mark and only mildly alerted the group. It was time to change plans. The barbarian, blunt as he is, actually came up with a good idea. Recalling on his military experience, the great brute suggested we wait for the roaming group to pass and blitz the guards at the door after first volleying them with long range attacks.

The group gathered up, the archers drew their bows, the sorceress prepared her blast, and I handed over my dagger to the barbarian. At once we volleyed our respective attacks before jumping over the wall and into the fray.

Tuesday, September 9, 2014

Chapter 1: The burning city

We smelled it before we heard or saw it.

As the group traveled West on the great wilderness we began to catch wiffs of the smell. That smell will remain forever fixed in my mind. It smelled of burning wood mixed with tar, flesh and hair. Our ranger knew immediately something was wrong. As we went towards the smell we stopped before the peak of a hill. Our ranger was able to spot chaos. People were looting a nearby village, burning down the houses and taking what they wanted.

Suddenly we heard a sound that shook me to the core. A dragon raged above the keep, spewing lightning out of it's mouth. We looked at each other and decided we needed to help these people. Running in through the gates we were expecting to encounter enemies at any time. What was more creepy, however, was the lack of action. Nothing was in the area save for bunt out shops and houses. That all changed when we got closer to the keep.

Suddenly we heard a high pitch screaming. A young woman, who could not have been older than 17 or 18, ran out of an alley clutching two children to her bosom. After her ran several Kolbolds, fiercely ugly creatures with a habit of eating whatever they could get their hands on. The woman tripped and the foul creatures surrounded her. There was no time to think, we immediately jumped into action.

We were able to pick of the creatures one by one, but eventually one of them croaked out something.

"Stop, prisoner."

Not knowing what the creature was talking about I attempted to stop the group from attacking, maybe we could have resolved this without further bloodshed. My attempts went in vein though, with our barbarian smashing the creature's  head in. Finally, after the sorceress yelled through the creatures' minds and I caused one to fall over laughing, the group ran. We had one, and we could interrogate it. That is, until the barbarian took its head off.

We needed to find out what was going on, so we took shelter in a nearby shop as our paladin took off, disguising himself as a Kobold he went to the group standing guard in front of the Keep. I later found out this group was Cultists. I can hardly keep my quill steady as I shake with rage. Those fucking bastards, they needed to pay. I can't believe I almost let one live.

The wizard noticed the group was gone, and we headed towards the Keep. Once inside we learned the Cultists were looting the village, and they did not think they could fight them off while keeping the Dragon at bay. After talking with the leader of the soldiers we set off to find a way out of the Keep in case we had to make a quick escape. We found a sewer tunnel, guarded by a little gnome. The half-ork does not like gnomes.

We were able to convince the gnome to help us out and we secured the tunnel. When we returned to the Keep we found our Paladin and Ranger, who sneaked into the Cultist's camp. They were severely outnumbering us. They let us know just how bad the situation was. Just then, the roar came again.

The Dragon was back

We ran outside into the courtyard to confront the beast. Any attempts we had to communicate it were in vein, it just wanted to kill and destroy. After a lengthy battle, and many dead guards. Our ranger was able to get an arrow past the creature's hide. The Dragon grunted in surprise and flew off. Our party went into the infirmary to rest before the leader of the keep came back to us.

"I have another favor to ask of you," he said.

Here we go.


Fire, blood and smoke, this was going to be a bad day.

After burying my parents I set out to find a group of heros that I could follow and write about. What I found, however, was a gang of misfits. A half-ork who thinks he is a full on oark. A sorceress who doesn’t speak other than through your mind. A paladin who would rather let his sword do his talking. A ranger with a bad aim, the ever-absent wizard, and me, the half-assed bard.

I don’t even know what lead me to this group. Maybe it was how they could manage to stand each other, or maybe, just maybe I had intuition that this group would lead me into trouble. So long story short I went up to this group as they were about to set out on an adventure and introduced myself. Looking back on it now I realize that was probably going to be the last normal thing I did in a long time.

Anyways,  to the members of the Bard's College. Please accept this message as the first in a series that will describe my adventure with the group. I look forward to hearing back from you. If you would accept me to the College of Valor I will do my best to make this a tale to last the ages.